Free speedo check !
 

Yorkshire police are offering free speedo checks for Bristols ! Apparently my speedo was reading a bit slow :-)

Wouldn't help me much. My 403 speedo needle waves around like an unlatched barn door in a storm !

Dave Dale

Free speedo check !
 

Hi Dave,
My speedo does the same, its like a demented clapometer from the old game
show days or swingometer used on election nights. On a long trip I use my
sat nav at least I have some idea and the rev counter is at least accurate.
Has anybody a cheap dependable cure?
Has anybody any tips on removing a 406 onwards dashboard, to fit a new
clock, mine is only correct twice a day!

I did not open Greg's posting, but I believe it to be a spoof that I have
seen before.

Nick

Well, I never read your posts either Nic the .....

But this may solve your timing problems ! -- and of course the bezel could be changed / coloured black to match /fool the car wash judges !

RETRO STYLE CLASSIC CAR DASHBOARD CLOCK on eBay (end time 16-Dec-10 10:02:53 GMT)


Greg :-)

And if you want perfection, this company will copy the original clock face for you.

dial restoration, uk

Or maybe you could have a face transplant and have one that is more pleasing on the eye !

Like mine :-)

Looking forward too not reading your reply !!

If you buy the clock gasket from Bristol and it is the wrong size - alter it until the hole suits your demanding needs.

Love and piece

Ozzy

Free speedo check !
 

wayward speedometer is often caused by a sticky or damaged / bent speedo cable.
The extra resistance in the flexible cable causes it to wind up like a spring and then unwind,
resulting in the speedo needle waving about all over the place.
First aproach is to take the cable inner out of its sleeve, clean and lubricate it.
If that doesn't fix it then it's usually a case for a new cable.
My speedo is dead steadybut 10% fast - and I've no idea why...
Martin

A spoof from Greg? His previous 247 posts must have been designed to lull us into a false sense of security!

Most of you will be running modern tyres which result in a lower tyre diameter than your car had originally, so your speedo will say you are going a bit faster than you actually are.

248 posts :-)

Free Speedo check
 

As Martin says, it's probably a case of poor lubrication or a worn cable. Premier Instruments in Canberra say that this is the most likely cause. Mine does it too and is due for attention. John Keighley

Yep - a new cable fixed my 408 speedo

Bought from Bristol Cars for about £20 and a piece of wee to fit - Just attach to the old one with gaffa tape a pull it through.

I think the old one would have been fine if I had made a plasticine funnel and let some light oil soak through overnight before reattaching to the speedo head.

I use the old cable with a cordless variable speed drill to test other speedo's. It's the only time I have had a Bristol speedo to 150 MPH !

249

Free Speedo check
 

Aha! I will try this on my old Land Rover when the weather improves -
hadn't thought of the cable being the culprit.
Mine waived around but then stopped close to it's top speed of about 40 mph.
Okay, 35 mph.
In this case the needle must have jammed as well. I recall all that's inside
those speedos is a magnet that rotates and a needle that tries to follow it,
attached to a weak coiled spring. Something to do on the kitchen table in
winter.... but too cold now to take it off!
Eric must be snowed in by now, up in them hills?
Andy.

Free speedo check !
 

Yes Kevin,

That does not cause the speedo needle to wave around unless you are on
retreads and the outer case is flapping in unison, :-)

Free speedo check !
 

Hi Greg,

Out of curiosity I did open your speedo check ( I have to keep up my posting
count)
How come you drive that slowly?
Last time I saw you, it was in a Bristol that had been crossed with a
Cadillac or Hot Rod! :-)

Nick

Proceed with care . . .
 

Difficult to judge this one — the wavering needle on two of my Bristols (one a 408) was caused through previous owners over-lubricating the cable and the oil (probably 20/50!) getting into the speedometer head.

Who knows who was driving that day ! because the camera took a picture from the rear on an empty road with a 30 MPH limit, the driver could not be prosecuted. So the lucky fat bearded racer got away without a fine.

My wife has since shaved her beard :-)

250

The good thing and bad thing about WD 40 is it disappears quickly.

Bad for locks and hinges and good for loosening nuts and bolts.


251

Free speedo check !
 

Hi Greg/Nick

I too have trouble keeping my Bristol within the legal limits. Last week I
got a £60 fine and 3 points off my license for driving at 40MPH in a 30MPH
zone. Perhaps I should argue my (new) speedo was at fault, although if I
were to question the penalty they may just look at other potential issues,
such as a slightly illegal number plate. I know I probably fully deserve it,
but in my defence I was travelling downhill having come off a dual
carriageway, didn’t want to press too firmly on the brakes, and had hoped my
dark number plate on my 411 would be unreadable by the police camera. Not
great arguments that would stand up in court I feel.

Free speedo check !
 

The "WD" is for Water Displacement, which WD-40
does very well, but it should not be considered
as a long-term lubricating agent.

Bob

Free speedo check !
 

Â.
Very bad luck bkz411, luck it is too,
Have you ever met anybody done by Specs.
Â.
By the way Greg, are you now a Senior member or did Hugh demote you when he found how young you were :-), Perhaps now that you are over 250 postings you will be reinstated.Â.
Â.
Looks like I will be buying a new Speedo cable from BCS from the postings, thanks for the info. I will have to do it whilst replacing my clock. Its too cold in the garage at the moment.
Â.
Nick

That's what wife's are for. Keep your licence clean and load their licence up with the points ! It's perfectly legal - probably.

252

No probs Nic, but worth just removing the cable from the speedo head and doing the funnel and oil first - nothing to lose and will probably fix it if not stretched to far.

253

free speedo check
 

For what it is worth - I have it on good authority that WD40 is not owned by the original makers and some time back the quality was allowed to become poor. Apparently it is ' thinner ' than it was originally and this is a cause of it not lasting as long after application for lubricating purposes.

Dave dale.

free speedo check
 

I've found Marvel Mystery Oil to be an excellent low viscosity lubricating oil for cables, door hinges, throttle linkages, and the like.

John

Replacing the cable gives temporary relief and lasts until the lubrication fails. Grease is too thick and WD40 obviously too light. Mystery Marvel looks worth a try. Is it the recommended by factory lube? P

Merry Christmas All
 

Thinking of Greg's original posting: I do have to say that I thought with their long literary tradition, the Welsh would have been more creative than these excuses:

The list of top excuses included:

"I was trying to sell my car and the person who was clocked by a speed camera was test driving the vehicle."
"My ex still has keys to my car and keeps taking it without asking. I haven't reported this to the police."
"My budgie was sick and I was rushing it to the vet."
"I had a dodgy curry and had to speed to the nearest toilet."
"An ice-scraper fell out of a compartment in the door and jammed the pedal."
"I picked up a hitchhiker who said they liked my car so I let them drive it. I don't have their name or address."
"My car was stolen overnight and returned to the same point. I didn't report this to the police as the first thing I knew of the matter was when a speeding ticket came through my door."
"A strong gust of wind pushed my car over the limit."
"As I joined the motorway, my car was dragged along in the slip stream of a truck. My brakes aren't very good, so I had to keep pace with it."
The Go Safe manager added: "People can make as many excuses as they like, but the simple fact is that if you don't break the speed limit, you won't get a ticket."

Salutations of the Season

Shaggy-dog speedo readings...
 

I'm tempted to add the top shaggy-dog account, the one about the spider's world-wide-web (I exaggerate but only very slightly) which, according to the right-honourable accused-in-the-dock, tied the speedo needle to rest-n-recovery position, yer 'onour, "and the verry-slight movement past 30 MPH was all it took to free the critter's shackles....yer 'onour" but I won't deviate that far off-topic.... I'd much rather remind all UK-n-World readers that in Court, even as late as 2009...Common Law still Rulez... and while The Accused might find it's hard to get away with Murder, all Official recriminations are Fair Game for a Creative-Commons Court traffic-misdemeanour appearance....believe it or Ripley not.

Watch this short video in awe.

This vid was/is highly illegal under court regs, BTW, no bat-fone-cams aloud they said... you are privileged to find out how the court wigs cave in in face of such cunningly-serious opposition. NB The key lies in getting the case heard under "Common Law" priovisions, whereupon the person appearing for the Named defendant (who "may or may not be present among the Public witnesses here in court") can demand the case be heard by a jury of 12 of the accused's fellow citizens.

It all becomes (only-slightly) clearer....

YouTube - English Freeman In Gloucester Court Part 1

MikeR